Lessons learned

Zuzu has taught me a few things, such as:

1. Baby #2 is not a duplicate of Baby #1. All our tricks for Katie fall flat with Zuzu. Zuzu doesn’t sleep like Katie did, she doesn’t eat like Katie did, she won’t be calmed the way Katie was. She hates the swaddle blanket, which was a sure-fire way to calm Katie and get her to sleep. BUT, white noise knocks her out like a light. She also doesn’t grow like Katie and she doesn’t act like Katie. I should have seen this coming with the pregnancy, which was nothing at all like the first.

2. Sometimes babies do keep the same routine they did in the womb. Zuzu is wide awake between 10 pm and 1 am…just like she was before she was born. We have GOT to reprogram this.

3. The toddler is more difficult than the baby. They say when you have two kids, the work multiplies exponentially. This is certainly true, however, this is caused not by the newborn, but the toddler. No joke- it takes us five years to get out of the house because we’re so busy rounding up Katie and stuff for her. Zuzu’s a breeze by comparison.

4. Being an only child as a parent greatly complicates having more than one child. This might be Reason #1,007 to have at least two kids. What I mean is, I am hyper-sensitive to making sure both girls get loved exactly the same, even though Zuzu can sleep in her bouncer oblivious to us around her. All I have is my imagined idea of what it’s like to share attention with a sibling…and the image in my mind is awful. I’m convinced we’re sending one child to therapy already. Eric, as you can imagine, does not have this problem. I honestly have to remind him to say goodbye to Zuzu most mornings and he will drop what he’s doing for Zuzu to tend to Katie. This might be his version of “zone defense,” but IT DRIVES ME CRAZY.

5. Even though my body tends to reject pregnancies at the end and neither baby laid in the proper position come time to deliver them, even though I was sicker this pregnancy than the first and more worn out at the end, and even though I will still probably look pregnant in a year and not lose all my baby weight EVER, I’m not opposed to Baby #3…in four years when Zuzu’s in kindergarten. But, I’m also not opposed to just two babies. Eric can make this call, which means that we won’t have any more babies because Eric never makes the call.

And finally, 6. I worry more now about the baby, even though I’ve done this before. I never had questions to ask with Katie. I don’t know how many times I’ve called the doctor with Zuzu. I’m a little shocked at how little I remember from the days Katie was this small. I should have written more down because maybe I would remember that sometimes, one parent can be a total freakin’ buzzkill for the other.

Okay, one more: 7. Baby #1 is a germ factory for Baby #2. It was five months before Katie caught a cold. It was seven weeks for Z. I’m sure this had nothing to do with the fact that Katie will stand over Zuzu and hack and sneeze right on her…

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2 thoughts on “Lessons learned

  1. speaking as baby #2, we’re perfectly fine snoozing away the day in a bouncer. still doin’ it and lovin’ it @ 33. i turned out fine. zuzu will too. but judging from eric . . . katie . . . well, we’ll see. just expect to be paying her college tuition well into her 30s, which i’m sure you will happily do b/c you’re both amazing parents.

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